St. Joseph & the Abandoned Food was a Santa Cruz band (1998) that included Noel Von Harmonson (guitar), Chris Cohen (drums), Andrew Maxwell (guitar) and Joseph Mosconi (vox).

There were only four live performances of St. Joseph, and on each occasion, the band featured a name distinct from the "canonical version" above. While "St. Joseph" remained static, the secondary name varied. In addition to "Abandoned Food", variations after the ampersand included "Substandard Cushion" and "Harlequin Knights".